Tag: meditation
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The Black Cat on the Lotus Leaf
On restlessness, and what happens when you stop fighting it. — Some mornings begin in the loop. You know the one. You wake up, the mind is already running, and before you’ve had a chance to breathe, you’re watching yourself watch yourself — aware of the restlessness, aware of the awareness, going in circles. This…
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Space.
On emptiness, devotion, and what the 40s are quietly teaching me. I used to show up every single week for Naruto. Not casually. Not when I felt like it. Every week, without being asked, without needing a reminder. I hated it at first — the main character seemed lame, the art underwhelming compared to the…
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Three Kinds of Action
A field report from someone who finds herself doing things. This afternoon, without deliberating too long, I picked up my ukulele and played. No plan. No mood board. No productivity timer. The mind wanted to play, the hands followed, and that was that. Afterwards, I thought: why can’t it always be like this? And then…
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Perfection
On a bright Saturday morning in May, I wanted to write a short story about a cat and a duck. A quiet, odd combination indeed, but it just so happens to be an image from a jazz music video I was listening to that morning. I want to write about this scene on my screen…
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The Savior Somewhere Else
On ashrams, fresh experiences, and the loop that follows you wherever you go. I am still looking for my savior somewhere else. Lately it takes the shape of an ashram. I imagine going there and learning the meditation Shiva is said to have taught — gaining existential awareness, the kind experienced directly rather than through…
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The Circle and the Center
Everyone is walking from the periphery of a circle to the center. But every single person’s path to the center is different. It is not a straight line but a crooked path. That center is death — or a place where everyone is equal. The paths traveled are filled with mountains and valleys. Everyone must…
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Koan – on name
In your mind Name a person who you hold dear. Think of all the emotions, feelings, behaviors, memories and how the person makes you feel, their face, their voice, a specific memory, how your body feels when thinking of them Now convert this name to a jumbled 16-character name. Store all the things associated with…
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The Body Knew First
I’ve spent most of my life living in my head. Thinking, analyzing, observing, inferring. I’ve read Krishnamurti. I’ve sat in meditation. I’ve mapped out how the mind filters reality — how experience becomes observation becomes memory becomes inference. I’ve written about it, spoken about it, circled it from every cerebral angle I could find. And…
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How Do You See What’s Already in Front of You?
I’ve been sitting with a question that came out of my last meditation, and it won’t leave me alone: How does one observe things fresh — in the moment — without the inference of the same room, the same neighborhood, the same life? How can I increase the gap between raw observation and inference, so…
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The Anatomy of a Filtered Life
If I map out how I move through the world, it looks something like this: Experience → Observation → Memory → Inference Four steps. By the time I reach the last one, I’m no longer anywhere near the truth of what actually happened. Let me walk through it — through my own life — to…
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On the Nature of Thoughts: An Exploration of Awareness
The Three Origins of Thought I tend to see for myself Our thoughts arise from three distinct sources, each revealing something fundamental about consciousness itself: The Voluntary Thought — Even in silence, when the mind rests quiet, I find myself reaching for something to think about. I summon a memory, usually from the past, pulling…
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The Energy of Thought: Observing the Spark Behind Our Feelings
What is energy? We talk about it all the time.“I feel drained today.”“I have no energy to do anything.”“I’m feeling low.” We know the body needs food, rest, and movement to sustain energy. But what about the mind? The heart? There’s a different kind of energy that fuels our inner world—the kind that lives inside…
memajuve 